Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Geenesh has awakened.

From this point, Geenesh will be the one here. No more will you be subject to the whiny, submissive bullshit that Vishnu put up. Geenesh will entertain and amaze in ways yet unheard of. Geenesh wishes the world a very good morning. And also tells it to fuck off. We think he sounds quite immature. Geenesh doesn't give a rat's ass. Geenesh is new. He is improved. He is madness and unbelievable. Geenesh will not be nice. He will not be polite. He will unequivocally fuck you all. He is here for a motherfucking change(Quote Neil Strauss.He's awesome.) If you have any doubts or issues. Please address them here. Now I am done. I am signing off. Bye

Geenesh
P.S: Tyler Durden FTW!

Friday, May 21, 2010

Best Post EVER!!!!!!

This was a conversation I had with one of my pseudo-cousins. The guy is 13 and the conversation takes quite a turn. Hold in mind that this is a child. A kid who's 13 years old. For the poor shmuck's sake he shall henceforth be referred to as 13kid. Towards the end I'm just saying shit to make him react. Here it is:

• 13kid :
• hey dude i seriously need ur help
• how do i propose a gal
• 8:17pmMe :
• hold on
• 8:17pm13kid :
• ya
• 8:19pmMe :
• why???
• 8:19pm13kid :
• cause i am krazy of her
• 8:19pmMe :
• ok?
• 8:20pm13kid :
• here is her pic
• 8:20pmMe :
• and does she like you?
• 8:20pm13kid :
• i don noe
• (Link removed)
• 8:20pmMe :
• then what's the point?
• Do you talk to her at all??
• 8:21pm13kid :
• she's in b'lore
• how can i
• 8:21pmMe :
• what's the point of asking her out if you can't Me :et her???
• talk on the phone?
• 8:22pm13kid :
• i donno her no.
• 8:22pmMe :
• does she even know you?
• 8:22pm13kid :
• dude she's ma ex van mate
• yup
• she noes Me :
• 8:22pmMe :
• talk to her on fb
• or chat
• get her number
• after you talk for soMe :tiMe :
• just say
• give Me : your number
• if she asks why
• just say you'd like to talk to her soMe :tiMe :
• if you can find the tiMe :
• do that first
• don't bloody dive into stuff you can't handle
• 8:23pm13kid :
• k thnx for advice
• 8:26pmMe :
• how coMe : all of a sudden man?
• how old is she?
• 8:26pm13kid :
• i found her profile 2day
• i year elder
• 8:26pmMe :
• how old is that?
• 15?
• 8:27pm13kid :
• she's jus in 11 std
• 8:27pmMe :
• what's her age man?>
• 16?
• 8:27pm13kid :
• i donno
• 8:27pmMe :
• how do you know she doesn't have a guy?
• 8:27pm13kid :
• gud question
• 8:28pmMe :
• what do you wanna achieve by asking her out?
• 8:28pm13kid :
• love boy
• 8:28pmMe :
• what?
• 8:28pm13kid :
• looooooooveeeeeeeeeeeee
• 8:29pmMe :
• love boy?
• ?????????????
• love boy?
• wtf?
• what???
• ok
• first
• you're not in love
• it's just a phase
• and also
• 8:30pm13kid :
• nono
• 8:31pmMe :
• you won't realize it now
• I hate to sound like a condescending dick
• but facts man
• anyway
• so after TELLING her
• what do you think will happen?
• 8:31pm13kid :
• mmmmmmmmm
• if she accepts i will be happy
• if not i will cry my entire life
• 8:32pmMe :
• No you won't
• 8:32pm13kid :
• y
• 8:32pmMe :
• you won't cry your entire life
• that's a fact
• 8:32pm13kid :
• yyyyyy??????/
• 8:33pmMe :
• I can promise you both my balls and ten thousand bucks
• that you won't give a shit about it after soMe : tiMe :
• but really
• now
• if she says yes
• what'll you do?
• what happens next?
• she's in blore
• so what next?
• 8:33pm13kid :
• den wat do i do
• i want her
• 8:33pmMe :
• That's what I'm asking you
• 8:33pm13kid :
• i lyk her for 5 years
• 8:33pmMe :
• what do you do?
• want her?
• want her how?
• 8:34pm13kid :
• yayayayayayayayayayayayya
• 8:35pmMe :
• HOW DO YOU WANT HER??
• WHAT DO YOU ME :AN YOU WANT HER??????
• ?
• 8:35pm13kid :
• i wanna live wid her
• 8:35pmMe :
• live with her?
• 8:35pm13kid :
• ya and marry
• 8:35pmMe :
• .....
• wow
• 8:36pm13kid :
• and i told ma mom i will marry only a northy
• 8:36pmMe :
• what?
• are you racist?
• 8:36pm13kid :
• no
• i lyk deir fud
• 8:36pmMe :
• ..........
• what?
• no
• seriously.
• .what.??
• 8:36pm13kid :
• food dey make
• 8:37pmMe :
• what??
• so you'll marry them??
• 8:37pm13kid :
• yup
• 8:37pmMe :
• why don't you marry the guy who cooks down at the restaurant?
• He makes excellent food doesn't he?
• 8:37pm13kid :
• shut up dufus
• 8:38pmMe :
• go on
• 8:38pm13kid :
• dis is true luv
• lyk vinnaithandi
• 8:38pmMe :
• continue
• I would like to hear more
• 8:39pm13kid :
• wat?
• 8:39pmMe :
• continue
• you were saying soMe :thing about true love
• 8:39pm13kid :
• frm my heart
• 8:40pmMe :
• yes?
• 8:41pmMe :
• and what else?
• would you do anything for her?
• 8:41pm13kid :
• sacrifice
• 8:41pmMe :
• like what?
• 8:41pm13kid :
• death
• 8:41pmMe :
• would you sacrifice your computer?
• 8:42pm13kid :
• no my body
• 8:42pmMe :
• but not your computer?
• what kinda love man?
• really
• I thought you LOVED her
• 13kid :
• ya
• 8:44pm13kid :
• k so u r tellin i shud forget her
• 8:44pmMe :
• no
• it's your choice
• go for it
• take the leap
• 8:44pm13kid :
• k
• kk
• 8:45pmMe :
• taMe : the lion!
• 8:45pm13kid :
• kkk

Seriously. How could I resist posting this?
Leather

Friday, May 14, 2010

A Day In My Life.

This happened on the day I got my bike back from the mechanic. The guy told me it was all good. Little did I know how wrong he was going to be proven. I took it out for a spin around 9.30 pm. At 10 pm one of the tires blows up. Now I'm left with a bike that won't run( how it's supposed to) and I'm PISSED! My first thoughts about the situation were pretty calm," THAT LYING MOTHERFUCKER WAS LYING TO ME!!!! I'M GONNA DROWN HIS CHILDREN IN BATTERY ACID!!". From this point on I will switch to what I typed earlier because I'm a lazy fuck:

I went out to get some stuff. While I was on Harrington Road it got punctured. At 10 PM. So I had to walk my ass off, with a broken slipper no less, to search for a mechanic. I couldn't find one so I had to walk back. I then pushed it for ages before this drunk watchman saw me. THEN I convinced the drunk watchman to let me park it inside.


While I was pushing it in to park, I stepped, with my broken slippered leg, on a HUGE fucking pile of red ants. I got the shit bitten out of me. Then the drunk watchman decides to tell me the story of his life, how his son abandoned him and earns like 38 grand or some shit. He asks me my name a dozen or so times. Finally he tells me to go home safe a million times. I took a fucking auto which totally ripped me off. And now I'm sitting here.

But, I've learned to appreciate the little things. Like the fact that I bought coffee, My grandmom gave me chocolates before I came here, I have a granola bar, And my room's way colder than outside. Hence, Whatever.


Now I will switch back to normal. So this is when I start thinking about how bad life can get. Shit could get much, much worse. Really. I could have been forced to blow the drunk watchman. I could have not bought coffee. I could have crashed and died. I could have not bought coffee again. So its alright. I'm pissed but what the fuck. Shit happens.

Leather

A Day In My Life.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

All The Best-An Honest Review

For those of you who haven't heard about this movie(Nearly impossible,considering the budget they must have blown on the advertising) go look it up.I haven't seen it but I'm still gonna review it and you can't stop me even if you tried.

Just when I thought that Bollywood couldn't get any worse I saw a song from this movie on Tv.It felt like getting smashed in the face by a hot iron and then getting salt rubbed in while being peed on.The song simultaneously assaulted all my senses by having Sanjay Dutt playing the drums,having the words "Roar It"(I should be fucking shot for even typing it out) in the lyrics and being a general shitpile.The song starts with The letters R-O-A..and I think,"Ok.This can't be as bad as I'm assuming." and it fucking ends with them saying "Roar it".And to patronize the viewers EVEN MORE, they fucking scream it out every half second.If they'd spent half the money they spent on the advertising towards killing the songwriters they would have had a movie that didn't kill people who watched it.It literally felt like my ears were being boiled in hot oil while someone drove stakes through my eyes.The pain!After I survived the song(I was intent on it.I had ensure that no one else has to endure the pain) I've developed a new understanding for the value of life.I'm dead sure the title 'All the Best' is the director's prayer to the gods of cinema.He realized that he'd basically created the movie equivalent of canned dog turds.Hence the title, 'All the Best'.

If you do manage to sit through this movie,alive and with your sanity intact, I will personally quote your name on this page as one of the all-time great survivalists(Although,I really won't).But seriously, I'm not just randomly trash-talking and being a dickhead.I'll even recommend a number of other things you could spend the ticket money on.Here's a list of things you could spend the money on instead of watching the movie:
1.A blowjob from a dubious looking hooker.Granted,you'd get about 10 STDs.But hey, It's better than sitting through this movie!

2.Hate someone beyond all mercy and human reason??Give them a free ticket to the movie!For added effect throw in tickets for their entire family,save one person.Preferably a child.Then watch as the entire family dies and the child is all alone.Then your revenge shall be complete!!Fufufufwahahaha!Unlike the killer videotape from 'The Ring',this movie'd kill them before it reached the halfway point.Great Success!

3.A Skrat Album.Skrat is this awesome band from Chennai.They're releasing a new album soon.It's like 100 bucks.Get it instead of watching this movie.

4.Stamps and envelopes for writing hate mail to everyone involved in the making of the movie.

5.I could probably keep waxing on about things you could do, but you get the point right?

6.Gum.Gum's always good.

If you're still unconvinced(doubtful) try and make it through this video of the aforementioned song, without dying a couple of times in between or attempting to poke your eyes out with a sharp object.



If you made it through to this line alive.Congratulations.Most people are so ungrateful to be alive.But not you.Not anymore.

Leather

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Twitter sucks.But who's gonna stop me?

Follow me on Twitter bitches!

www.twitter.com/raptorbyt

Any new updates to the blog will be posted there.Enjoy it.Your life is a lot better now.

And if anyone needs a good,new thing to do that'll enrich your life in ways you never imagined,go watch Fight Club(The original one in ENGLISH) and THEN read the book.Read the damn book.Don't just stop at watching the movie.If you can't find the book in stores(which I'm sure you won't find) get a copy of the ebook.I won't post links here because of copyright issues.Work for your happiness.You'll appreciate it more that way.

Leather

Monday, October 26, 2009

6 Months In My Life.

Ah!A post after nearly half a year.Not technically as no one counts the year like that.But the last 6 months have been phenomenal.I've been through the worst and the best times of my life(I'm exaggerating but who gives a shit,really?).Right on to my topic.I'll bring you up to speed on what's been happening in the last 6 months.

1.I got into Symbiosis Law School( I risk detection of my blog by my college's authorities by entering the name here but what the hell!) on my own.On merit.Got ranked 5th overall.This after the plethora of teachers,well-wishers(*cough*yeah right*cough),classmates,aunties,uncles and others informing me that I was likely to end up in a crap college with my parents having to pay out of their noses and other bodily orifices.I guess they were all correct and I ended.....Oh wait!I guess you were all wrong and I had and am still having the last laugh(It's quite a long laugh that resonates for a good amount of time) because I got into one of the best fucking law schools in the damn country!!And I earned it.And my college life kicks so much ass I can't start to describe it.As an additional awesome-factor, most of the students in my class who studied 24x7 and scorned me when I had fun ended up in crap colleges with THEIR parents paying through their noses and other bodily orifices.

2.I got a SWEET new laptop.Finally I get a thing that's almost as awesome as me.It kicks donkey ass!I special ordered it with a friggin' 1 GB Graphics Card.I can finally play every game I ever wanted.This means that Prototype,Prince of Persia 4,Left 4 Dead,Batman:Arkham Asylum and....and......RESIDENT EVIL 5!!!! are all playable on my laptop!!!With no problems.Except an overheating issue(Damn you HP for not building a better Heat Dissipation System!!)OHHHHHHHHHHH!!!Gamer-gasm.

3.As an addition to my AWESOME LAPTOP I got an AWESOME controller to play games.Apart from being ergonomically designed(Yes.I'm reciting it from the manual) and looking like a fucking dream-machine,that runs on children's dreams and pink hearts,that's designed to give orgasms it's also....wait for it..............WIRELESS!!!!So I can be an even bigger douchebag and sit 30 feet away and play games.Why would I do something like that???BECAUSE I CAN!!!



4.I'm attempting imitation of a goat.Via growth of hair on my face.And just to be a dick I'll put up a photo of my face.Taken with my NEW LAPTOP'S WEBCAM!!HA!



So in closing I would like to say....SO LONG SUCKERS!!It's been good posting again.